(Suggested read before this one - The Beginning of the end - https://stilltakingitasitcomes.blogspot.com/2019/06/diary-of-menopauser-beginning-of-end.html)
So what have I figured out so far… firstly that this is not
even Menopause yet L
Its whats called Peri-Menopause. The first thought I had when I read about this
name was that its obviously very to-the-point – I mean Peri-Peri is a sharp
flavour with a pretty unique caught-you-by-surprise element to it. J
The consolation was of course that I wasn’t imagining things
– but the frustration was that there was just a bunch of shitty stuff available
online which kind of takes being clinical to a different level altogether.
Nowhere did I find elements of what kind of almost violent emotional mood
swings you can experience due to this. This is in sharp contrast to absolutely
soothing and emotional hand-holding I got via online forums when I was pregnant
just a few years ago. I was told when to expect depression or an unexplained
emotional-high or what kind of pressures it will put on my mental state etc. I
felt like so many other women’s experience is now going to come in handy for me
on my own parenting journey. And it did.
Till I started talking to other women – my school and my age
friends made over years – I was worried about being accused of having an
over-active imagination (yet again!). To my utter relief, most were immediately
able to confirm that I was not alone on this trip. However somewhat to my
surprise, not everyone was researching or trying to figure it out as much as I
was. I guess that’s where being who you are as an individual comes into play –
and my researcher mindset sets me apart from others. So why not use it to not
just mine but maybe some others’ advantage as well?
My very first area of inquiry was if there’s something I can
do to minimise if not eliminate the hugely painful symptoms. I shouldn’t really
be surprised but if anything that hasn’t been commercialised yet, it doesn’t
really find much traction in today’s consumerist age. So the only articles I started
coming across were mostly based Not-in-India (of course!). I could have maybe
still been happy if any of them at least told me that there is hope. There is
something that allows you to beat this shitty-trip of life. But alas… These
were only capturing the point that there’s nothing really you can do about it.
Some Omega 3 and Isoflavanoes get mentioned as a potential option – however
even these at best seem to be taking a chance at MILDLY reducing SOME of the
symptoms. L
Hence this has been shelved for the time being – more on
this once I can get my hands on some personal feedback from women who might
have actually used them. But considering most of these things are for general
health – I really doubt if anyone will tell me that she “woke up everyday with
a spring in her step and danced her way through this phase”.
So onto my next area of investigation – is there something
I’m supposed to do to track the whole bloody thing – or actually the reducing
bloody thing really. Well there you come across the most used-misused-abused
phrase in medical science – “Everyone is unique” Grrrr… if only I could shoot
down anyone who used this with me, I genuinely think we’ll have a much lesser
populated country and maybe the world too!
I am also very cognizant of the fact that this is a long
haul and pretty much life changing phenomena. Its not like once this is over
and done with – my life will ‘go back to being normal’. THIS IS THE NEW
NORMAL L
So over the last few weeks since I finally, reluctantly, dragging my feet about the whole thing, cribbingly, cryingly - started accepting the presence of this in my life, I have just about also
started to accept that this is here to stay. The changes will not reverse –
unlike a pregnancy where you do live with the hope (and promise) of getting
your original body back. I know i am not a testament to that either - but please, at least there was hope. At least there were others who showed me it was possible. Not like this here - anyone who's gone through this one-way-street - simply smiles and sympathizes....
But yes at the same time – I do realise that talking about
this and even more so, writing about it has made me conscious of the experience
itself. So couple of weeks back when I first caught myself losing my temper at
my oh-so-poor patidev, I did stop and tell myself – This is the hormones
talking. Not that it made me calm – but it did bring over a certain control
which I wouldn’t have had without the consciousness. It also helped that I issued
an immediate – WATCH OUT here comes the bitch mode – warning to him. To be
precise my exact words were – “I will have my hormones to blame for what
happens over the next few days. Make sure you have some concrete explanation as
well”. J Maybe that’s why he kept all his late night
meetings and calls for that week ;)
Sense of humour may not help me speed up this evil menace –
but it certainly eases up the journey. Or so I think currently.
I do realise that the big daddy of this disease / ailment / phenomenon / menace / natural progression or simply put - aging symptom called Menopause - has yet to hit me - HOT FLASHES. I hear
they are quite a Voldemort (and certainly those-who-shall-not-be-named)
character in this story. Those who’ve
had him visit, kind of give me a very smirky look which seems to say – “Darling,
you’ve seen nothing yet!” ~ Shiver runs
through my body ~
Have heard stories of different rooms being occupied to avoid divorce over temperature control across many households. No wonder AC brands are making so much money these days! Maybe some innovative guy will finally put in an M-setting on the remote and mint money out of men who have these women at home! 😈
Comments